Tell The Story
I was shocked when I was diagnosed with cancer. I was simply shopping at my local grocery store, in the frozen food section. My phone rang, I answered as I always do; "Hello Gorgeous! This is Kim, how can I help you?" It was my doctor on the other end of the phone explaining to me that the biopsy from my colonoscopy came back and it was cancer. He followed it by saying that if you had to have cancer this was a good one to have. WAIT!!!!! What just happened????? I walked into the grocery store a healthy individual and I am walking out as a woman with cancer??? How can that be???
I finished my shopping and when I got to my car, I had myself a good old fashioned sob fest and pity party!! I didn’t understand why God would allow this to happen to me. Being a widow wasn’t enough? Now I needed to have cancer too?? Really God???
This was always my biggest fear. That after taking care of a sick husband for 20 years, that I would get sick and there would be no one to take care of me. I couldn’t believe that this was happening to me.
I needed to gather my thoughts before could share this with anyone else. So, after my good cry I went on with my day as if nothing had happened. I didn’t say a word to anyone.
I wanted things to be normal. I didn’t want anyone to look at with eyes of sympathy or pity. I didn’t want to be sick. And I didn’t want to be treated differently because I now had cancer.
I kept this news to myself for a long while, I then shared it with my family and my team but I kept this off of social media. I had a tribe around me that I wanted to keep in the loop of surgery and my progress going forward, but I didn’t want this to be common knowledge. So we created a Facebook group and kept it private.
6 months after my surgery I remember feeling the urge to tell the story. To share with the world that I had been diagnosed with cancer, how they found it and where I was now. I felt compelled to let down my guard and share all of the details. It was very uncomfortable, but I did it. I wrote about it , I spoke about it and I shared what I could about what I had been through. I wasn’t sure why I felt that this was important to do but I felt moved and I make a habit to follow that prompting.
I noticed that no ones opinion of me changed. No one looked at me any different, not one person. I felt loved and cared for. I felt the compassion that people had for me. I was glad that I had decided to share the story.
Several months ago, I discovered that a long time salon client of mine, who also became a good friend, was diagnosed with colon cancer. I reached out to her to let her know that I was there to support her if she needed anything. She shared with my that she was keeping her battle very private. I explained to her that I knew exactly where she was coming from. She then went on to thank me for sharing my story. It was only after she heard my story about my cancer and how they found it, that she scheduled her colonoscopy and that is when her cancer was discovered.
Sometimes we share our story not for ourselves but for the benefit of others. I am grateful that I found the courage to share my story and that I was able to help someone. I need to look beyond myself more times than I do and realize that it is not always about me!
